Marriage seems to be heavenly when you are with your loved one, but when was the last time you saw his pay statement, ladies? Often, most relationship issues arise in a family, only during the discussion of financial conditions.
But, those cases where both of them work, the expenses are mostly split between the two. Now, here comes a frequently heard complaint. Although the husband pays majority of the bills and the wife is expected only to pay those petty domestic bills, yet she is not given access to his paycheck.
Absence of transparency
The main essentials of married life is transparency. You need to first ensure that there are no secrets between the two of you, no matter how sensitive it may be; especially financial information. Knowing about each other’s financial status is very important. Lack of knowledge in this can harm your life, causing rifts and lying/infidelity.
In the same way, it is also essential that you share the expenses. Just one person paying all the bills might burden, causing a major breakdown at some point. On the other hand, if your husband is hesitant to share financial information, it might harm your relationship in a larger way.
How to deal with it
There is no way you can evade such discussions. The main way in which you can deal with it, is by talking about this to your spouse openly, to find out if there is anything bothering him from sharing his financial information. Tell your husband that sharing such information is not going to change the routine (splitting of expenses), but this is only to know everything about him.
Sometimes, this may also be due to habits, which may be unknown to you. It can be anything, right from a craving mandatory weekend night outs or charity which you may not encourage, to supporting his parents or a child for education or anything. In such cases, talk to him and make him understand that you are there to support him in all stances, and sharing secrets will only strengthen your interpersonal relationship.
You need to understand that once you are married, your financial status assumes a new form according to the law. Hence, it is necessary to know each other’s pay information, which will also improve the understanding and help in better family bonding. It is alright to have separate bank accounts and credit card, but a basic knowledge is essential.
This may sound rough, but however, if your husband refuses to share such details even after a discussion, you will have to think twice if your relationship is truly a healthy relationship or losing its path. One who refuses to share secrets, may be not be willing to share his entire life too.