Independent daughters but homely wives! Why?


It is said that keeping double standards, especially in the cases of females, is a habit for men. Thus though they may be want to date the hottest girl of the class, they will end up marrying a simple woman.

independent daughters homelyn wives

The same hypocrisy is seen in yet another case. For fathers, they want their daughters to be bold, fierce, and independent but when it comes to describing the qualities for their wives- tables turn! They want sober, simple, soft-spoken and “typically homely” wives. What then makes them hold such a distinction?

When it comes to finding the cause behind the situation, it boils down to one fact -the upbringing. Boys who have been used to seeing their mothers behind the curtains tend to prefer their wives in a similar manner. However, as the world changes in order to show them good to the society, they agree to break the shackles.  They give their assent to their daughter clubbing, partying and being so-called ‘independent.’

What then fosters such a different attitude of the gender towards two protagonists of the opposite sex? Studies reveal it is the level of comfort and roles each play. A man feels more powerful and in command while communicating with his wife. He thus believes as she is his other half and someone who represents him in his absence, she must be obliged to bend to the rules.

On the other hand, a daughter is one of his own; she becomes his own blood. In that case, appeasing to her demands and giving in makes him a doting father. A little independence before marriage is okay is believed by a man in general.

Another way of seeing this picture is that a wife sees more of what is good for you. In a good wife, you find qualities like attractiveness, obedience thus making them the gateways which will make you happy as a man. However as a father you ideally take opposite roles and thus, you decide to good for her life. As a father you think of what is good for her instead of you.

If one has to believe there is another philosophy also. A wife is supposed to and generally tends to stay with the man for the rest of his life. Thus, that can be another reason of the divide believing that once a daughter gets married she ceases to be the father’s responsibility forever.