Why Do Men Cheat and How to Handle Them?


o-CHEATING-HUSBAND-facebookAccording to University of Texas Professor of Psychology David Buss, men crave for sexual variety. “They have evolved a desire to be with different women”, he says. The reason could be the biological need to produce as many offspring as possible. If a man is only dedicated to one woman, then he as to wait for one year for another offspring of his. So he is biologically programmed to create more offspring by mating many women, says David.

Caveman Instincts

Men are mentally inclined to be adventurous. The danger involved excites them. They are easily bored by what they are accustomed to. So they are always on the lookout for something more exciting.  Hence it is easier for them to seek new avenues for satisfaction than to try and work out the existing relationship. Its their inner caveman instincts, says an author. They are always looking for a new prey to hunt. Only now, their prey is a woman.

Guys are also generally designed to think of sex and love as two unconnected aspects of a relationship. They can love their wife dearly and yet desire to have sex with another woman. Women who allow married men to have sex with them should also realise that they could have sex with them without necessarily loving them. This is very hard for a woman to understand as they consider love and sex to be interconnected, with sex being the outcome of love.

What a Woman Can Do

According to the psychologists, if a man’s sexual urge is satisfied in a non-threatening atmosphere, he would go back to it as often as he can. Because he never feels guilty about his extra-marital physical relationship and the only fear he has is the fear of being found out. Hence it is important for a woman not to make him feel horrible if his misdeeds are known. That would only make him resent more.

A woman needs to also understand that, based on the fact that love and sex and entirely different aspects for a man, her husband may not be cheating her because he hates her. It may just be his biological instincts taking over. So, before you start hating him and punishing him, give him the benefit of doubt and provide him with enough opportunities to get back to you.

There are a few things a woman can do, it rein in her cheating husband:

1) Create a friendly atmosphere at home

2) Stop nagging him when he gets home

3) Don’t force him to love you, but give him some space

4) Take care of his daily needs so that he feels you still love him

5) Seduce him gently and occasionally remind him of your feelings.

Its Just an Excuse

Juliet Williams, associate professor of women’s studies, is of the opinion that since the percentage of males who do not cheat their partners are much higher than the ones that do, the excuse that male cheating is based on a male’s biological characteristic, is not true.

So whether it is a biological instinct or just an uncontrolled urge, the fact that males tend to cheat their female partners, remains. Many of those who don’t, abstain for the fear of jeopardising their social standing. This proves that ultimately, the decision to cheat or not to cheat rests purely on the man.