Coping with Verbal abuse in a marriage

Abusive spouse
Abusive spouse

They say that your spouse can hurt you the most, because he or she knows well your soft corners. (S)he is aware of your likes and dislikes and hence knows where to hit when intended to hurt you the most.

When such intentions grow in frequency and nature then they are the worst forms of “verbal abuse’.

There always has to be a limit till when you can tolerate such abuses and have to take action before they get converted to physical abuse.

There are certain suggestions to handle verbal abuse as mentioned below:

Keep your cool

When you see your partner losing his temper and blowing his top, the bets things you can do is be cool and quiet. A fire can be extinguished with only a coolant and not another fire. Keeping this mind, maintain your cool till the time it doesn’t get intolerant, but the tolerance level has to be quite high.

Don’t get into an argument

When your spouse is on the mode of saying things which are not rational, you should avoid getting into an argument. Talking to person who has lost all rationality will be as good as talking to a wall. So, it makes no sense to get into argument by forwarding any explanation or logic form your end.

Divert yourself

When your partner starts getting abusive, divert your attention towards other things. Do some work not an important one because you would tend to make mistakes? You can watch T.V. or talk to your friends and family and get busy so that the “abusive words” do not hit you directly.

Make the person understand

There will be a time when your partner will come back to a normal state, this is when you should put your point and make him or her understand about the pain you get of such abuses.

Consult a counselor

Make it a point to visit a counselor to get immediate help on this issue. You may not be able to analyze the situation on your own, so it is always advisable to consult a relationship expert who will have a broader range of inspecting and understanding things.

After you have made all possible efforts and still you see no change in your partner’s attitude, then you should get prepared to come out of the relationship as save yourself from being abused for the rest of your life.